Dear runner with the not-quite-tight-enough-tights, next time, please either put on some undies that hold your junk in tighter, or get better tights, because while it was kind of interesting to see you prove that you were definitely male, it was also mightily odd to see your gonads flopping back and forth while you ran.
Dear walkers, I appreciate that you have to get out and exercise as well, but please get a clue about the rules of the trail, stay to the right, and try not to jump to the left when someone tells you they’re passing you on that side.
Dear cyclists, thank you for behaving for once. I suppose the bad weather meant only the hardiest and smartest of you were out. Bravo.